Alessandra comes to me with questions on “how to survive” in the business. I say, Darwin was right—it’s all about survival of the fittest.
Alessandra: It seems like you have to be a panther or tiger or something to really get what you want in the business. How do you know if you have what it takes? Should I hire Simon Cowell to give me an evaluation or something?
Lindy: A long time ago, when I was first starting out, I attended a seminar at UCLA. The professor said, “The entertainment business is very much like high school; the people in the center are the most popular and the ones around them, are trying to get the attention of the ones in the center.” He said at some point you have to know if you have the personality for this kind of business; if you have whatever “it” is to make it in this business. I thought that was rather interesting, and never forgot it. I saw many folks fall by the wayside as I climbed the ladder. I can’t point to any one or two things that contributed to that, but I did see that there is a certain kind of person who makes it in this business. She/he doesn’t have to be the most popular, but they do have to have a sense of resiliency, optimism, and professionalism.
CLIMB THE CAREER LADDER:
BUILD SOME CONFIDENCE:
Alessandra: How do you get those characteristics? Can you buy them at your local supermarket?
Lindy: It takes time to develop. I think first off, you need to know if you have a fast thought process and move quickly. You should also have a decisive personality. People in the entertainment business often say, “He/she gets it” and that is really just a code phrase meaning that this person is one of us; he or she can play the game, they know how it works. There doesn’t need to be a lot of explaining or long discussion about something.
If you’re a really insecure personality or someone who needs constant affirmation, or shrivels at the thought of rejection, this really isn’t the business for you. It’s a tough business, there’s no doubt about that. And you have to REALLY want to succeed.
Alessandra: So basically, I should start developing a sense of confidence. I guess talking to you and other mentors helps. The more confidence I have, the better I am at finding a career. It's like dating-- without self-confidence, you're not desirable to ANYONE.
DATING: ODDLY LIKE FINDING THE CAREER THAT FITS
Lindy: That sounds right.
Alessandra: Ya, I read some dating books.
Lindy: Maybe I should read these dating books so that I can offer even better career advice.
Alessandra: No—you’re fine without them. It’s funny because, I used to be that insecure person you’re talking about (the one that needs constant affirmation). What helped me get out of that phase was 1) Growing up a bit (so young readers should know that it can just be a phase, not a character trait) and 2) Developing a support group, including mentors like you.
Lindy: Yes, getting support from your friends and colleagues certainly helps you stay confident in the business. That’s why it’s important to develop a group of career-oriented friends and to STAY CONNECTED to them.
CHEESY, BUT NECESSARY:
Alessandra: Got it. I’m going to make a Facebook group now of all my friends in the entertainment biz…
Lindy: You can mention my website.
Alessandra: YES. Thank YOU, lindydekovencoaching.com !
Lindy: Thank YOU, alessandrarizzotti.com!
Alessandra: That was self-promotion at its finest moment. Now, for those of you who want to get an evaluation of your own character and see if you ARE right for the business, I would say, arrange a phone conversation with Lindy: 310) 246-1973.
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